This is a Pepsi


This is an alarm clock


It is NOT NICE to wake someone up by pouring Pepsi in their ear. Not nice at all.

"If you ever reach total enlightenment while drinking beer, I bet it makes beer shoot out of your nose." ~Jack Handy

While I was driving this afternoon, I accidentally looked into the rear view mirror and realized that my nostrils are not symmetrical. I called my boss at home right away to tell her and she had some really icky suggestions for fixing the problem... so that was a short conversation. I called my friend Amber at work, and she at least feigned sympathy... so that was nice. It makes you think. It is so nice and I am so fortunate to have friends close enough to...
call in the middle of the night to comment on the infomercial of the hour... cover their car windows with bar-b-que sauce because I couldn't get he safety strip off the box of plastic wrap... ask for nasal, ear canal and pedicure inspections... and ask just about anything else for which my family would have me put safely away. Life is good.

Friday Five...

I can hold a pencil and write my name with my toes, but only with the toes on my right foot. I am right-handed, but I love left-handed men.

I would rather be at a cabin... in the woods... by a lake than anywhere else in the world.

Chandabear wants me to spoil biting insects by buying them fancy window-coverings, but I'm not going to do it.

It takes eight daisies to make a ring big enough to fit over my head.

I've never met a radioactive pop culture icon that I didn't like.

And Then There's Maude...



Lady Godiva was a freedom rider
She didn't care if the whole world looked.
Joan of Arc with the Lord to guide her
She was a sister who really cooked.

Isadora was the first bra-burner
Ain't ya glad she showed up (Oh Yeah!)
And when the country was falling apart
Betsy Ross got it all sewed up.

And then there's Maude,
And then there's Maude,
And then there's Maude,
And then there's Maude,
And then there's Maude,
And then there's Maude,
And then there's

That old uncompromisin', enterprisin', anything but tranquilizing,
Right On Maude

(Composed by Marilyn and Alen Bergman and Dave Grusin)

Hm... I want a theme song too.

Man, this week's been flying!

Five more things...

I love burned popcorn. I prefer pan-burned to microwave-burned, but I will eat either one. I can't watch the Scream movies without Jiffy Pop.


I keep a box of Celestial Seasonings green tea on my desk, but the guy on the package reminds me of the devil, so I keep it turned around.


I also have a baffled chicken, a cute duck, a sand castle mold, a bumper sticker that says, "My Drinking Team Has a Bowling Problem" (that's for Al, the tech manager), and this quote on my desk: "But I don't want to go among mad people," Alice remarked. "Oh, you can't help that," said the Cat. "We're all mad here. I'm mad. You're mad." "How do you know that I'm mad?" said Alice. "You must be," said the Cat, "or you wouldn't have come here". (Lewis Carroll)


Examples of Miracles:
People being friends after being enemies
Volcanoes
Pop Rocks
Birds. (All of them)



I don't think that I could decapitate someone with the serrated edge of a Raisinettes bag, even if time was not a factor.