It actually wasn't that bad... First, I went tanning. I love tanning, but my skin is naturally see-through and when I'm naked, I resemble a plucked duck. So... after about fifteen minutes, somebody came in and threw orange juice and rosemary on me. Wow... did I smell good! I left, though, when they started stuffing parsley under me. Dammmit.

When I made it back home, I decided to do some online shopping. Li'l bit of buyer's remorse, though. I'm thinking that I should have gone with the prehensile tongue attachment. It's great for fishing, very convenient, and man, everyone loves it! Instead, I ordered the v2.5 personality upgrade. It came with a free sarcasm module, at least. I wanted the one that included facetious, ironic and acerbic wit. This one did come with some user programmable irony, but is a Microsoft program, and therefore witless.

Sweet dreams, everyone.

It's three in the morning and I just got off a three hour bridge with techies from three states. I'm so glad that I don't have to work tomorrow. Did I mention that our tech folks have no sense of humor? I did find out, though, that if you say the word "donut" enough times on a conference call, they'll eventually let you hang up. The "It's time to make the donuts" guy owes me big. I just signed on to say that I'm not saying anything tonight. I accidentally put my head down on the desk here a minute ago and it didn't want to come back up. Happy Mondays, you guys.

I like to call it "Happy-No-Pants-Day", but it turns out the police just call it "Saturday". And guess who the judge sided with... again?!?!

I'm working late tonight, mostly alone. I think that my office building is probably haunted, but only in the restroom. Yep. It's gonna be a good night!

Took the duck on a road trip tonight. It's not as bad as it looks, really. He is inspector #14. Half an hour earlier, he was Inspector Gadget.. but those pictures weren't really blog-appropriate.

I am sorry, Sir, but due to an odd interpretation of a little-known clause of the recently enacted Patriot Act 2, I am not allowed to talk to you until your potential ass-hattery has been either disproven or demonstrated.

I understand, Ducky, and I wouldn't normally eat anything this yellow, but....